NFL Power Rankings Week 8

NFL Power Rankings Week 8: Halloween Edition

This season’s been spooky.

  1. Eagles (7-1) — | Previous Rank: 1
    Scream.  The young handsome dude who you knew had it in him but you didn’t actually think was capable until you saw him do it.   Next: Denver
  2. Chiefs (6-2) | Previous Rank: 2
    Leatherface.  You’re never certain of what his origin story is, and whether or not its actually real. Even though it won’t ever actually be the scariest movie, Texas Chainsaw is pretty solid and never tries too hard to be something it’s not, and every now and then when it gets a star like Jessica Biel it turns out to be better than you thought. Next: @Dallas
  3. Steelers (6-2)  | Previous Rank: 3
    Jason.  Classic and has always been around, but then they take him to space and you’re all like “mm idk” at the beginning because it kinda sucked but then you’re like “I guess it was only a matter of time before he ended up in space” and then you’re fine with it until you realize your bike got stolen.  Next: Bye
  4. Vikings (6-2) | Previous Rank: 4
    Blair Witch Project. Pretty good movie even though you can’t really name any of the actors and the ones you can name you’re not even sure of who’s the lead.  Next: Bye
  5. Bills (5-2) +1 | Previous Rank: 6
    Chucky.  Had a really strong and consistent run in the 90s, and whenever you see it on you think “why don’t they try that anymore?” and then change the channel.  Next: @NYJets
  6. Patriots (6-2) +1 | Previous Rank: 7
    Saw.  Very predictable yet extremely erratic.  You know Jigsaw will always win, but does a good job of lulling you to sleep thinking that it’s finally gonna happen, only to see that old dude give the same boring speech after a win. Next: Bye
  7. Rams (5-2) -2 | Previous Rank: 5
    IT.  Was around in the 80s and then came back and everyone was into it but no one realizes that no one even really liked IT back then.  Next:  @NYGiants
  8. Saints (5-2) +1 | Previous Rank: 9
    Cloverfield.  First one was really good.  Like really good.  The second one looked mysterious and intriguing and turned out to be a totally different kind of movie under the same name.  Still good though.  Next: Tampa Bay
  9. Panthers (5-3) +1 | Previous Rank: 10
    The Hills Have Eyes.  Very underrated at times, but also very overrated at times. Had a lot of action, jump scares, a little comedy and some good tension.  Next: Atlanta
  10. Seahawks (5-2) +1 | Previous Rank: 11
    Hostel.  Gorey with a lot of noise and action and a pretty good sequel.  Next: Washington
  11. Jags (4-3) -3 | Previous Rank: 8
    Jeepers Creepers.  First one was pretty good because it was different and held up well against other classic movies; sequel not so much.  Next: Bengals
  12. Cowboys (4-3) +1 | Previous Rank: 11
    They look like Cowboys but their guns are just really those cap guns that just make noise.
  13. Falcons (4-3) +2 | Previous Rank: 11
    They have a cool mansion but they’re still handing out fun size, one per kid.  Next: @Carolina
  14. Lions (3-4) -2 | Previous Rank: 12
    Frat Stafford I bet throws the best halloween party in the NFL. Next: @GreenBay
  15. Titans (4-3) +6 | Previous Rank: 21
    Mariota almost certainly was handing out candy in business attire.  Next: Baltimore
  16. Texans (3-4) +2 | Previous Rank: 18
    Watson is the only cowboy in Texas.  Next: Indianapolis
  17. Redskins (3-4) -3 | Previous Rank: 14
    What’s scarier than that WR corps? Next: @Seattle
  18. Chargers (3-4) +1 | Previous Rank: 19
    Rivers transformed into the T-1000 after finally exerting enough pressure and heat that he literally turned himself into a hunk of molten metal. Next:  Bye
  19. Ravens (4-4) +9 | Previous Rank: 28
    The fact they’ve gone up and down across 20 total spots over the last 2 weeks either proves their inconsistency or my erratic opinion of them. Next: @Tennessee
  20. Jets (3-5) | Previous Rank: 20
    How bad did we think they were going to be at this point?  Next: Buffalo
  21. Bears (3-5) | Previous Rank: 21
    The Shining.  Because John Fox is gonna drive himself insane.  Next: Bye
  22. Bengals (3-4) +6 | Previous Rank: 28
    The Goonies.  Next: @Jacksonville
  23. Dolphins (4-3) -6 | Previous Rank: 17
    Nothing is scarier than being a fan of theirs and seeing them lose a starting QB and trading away your best player in a span of 2 weeks.  Next: Oakland
  24. Broncos (3-4) -5 | Previous Rank: 19
    Jump scare in 3…2..1- BROCK OSWEILER MIGHT START!!!! Next: @Philadelphia
  25. Packers (4-3) -15 | Previous Rank: 10
    Idk but I feel that Green Bay fans give out the worst candy.  Next: Detroit
  26. Raiders (3-5) +3 | Previous Rank: 29
    Exorcist.  Really good in the 70s.  Next: @Miami
  27. Buccaneers (2-5) -2 | Previous Rank: 25
    Jack Sparrow looks a lot like their logo.  Next: @NewOrleans
  28. Cardinals (3-4) -6 | Previous Rank: 22
    And Then There Were None.  AP is the eccentric billionaire that never gets revealed.  Next:  @SanFrancisco
  29. Giants (1-6) -1 | Previous Rank: 28
    Nightmare on Elm Street.  As long as you’re not afraid, they can’t beat you in the Super Bowl.  Next: LARams
  30. Colts (2-6) | Previous Rank: 30
    Heard there were plans of attempting to make the Manning Statue come alive with the only offering being having to watch an entire season hoping Luck will come back.  Next:  @Houston
  31. Winless Club49ers (0-8) | Previous Rank: 31
    Alien.  Great movie franchise from late 70s through all the 80s and even though the recent adaptations haven’t been too good, their new star Michael Fassbender is ridiculously goodlooking. Next: Arizona
  32. Browns (0-8) | Previous Rank: 32
    Scary to think Lebron is probably the best football player in the state of Ohio.
    Next: Bye
christopher.john.mora

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